Saturday, January 13, 2007
On our own
After one fabulous, extraordinarily helpful month, my parents began their journey home. I felt pretty devistated, though I know that I am much stronger than that first impossible week home when I made my mother promise she wouldn't leave me if I wasn't OK. I still cry easier than normal but not constantly. I'm tired, but my body doesn't ache in every possible place all the time, just two or three tender areas. Ahuva has grown so much that she is easier to handle with confidence. I still have a hard time reading her "cues" but I'm trying to learn. Last night for instance, it was pretty clear to me and Adi that she was OVERTIRED but it wasn't obvious to us what to do about that until eventually the three of us just crashed in mutual exhaustion in our bed.
I will need ongoing help, as it was a major feat to get dinner on the table last night (I didn't get to eat it in one sitting either) even though all I had to do was put a dish in the oven that my mother prepared before she left.
Adi is happy to be facing the challenges of parenting together, just us and I guess it is time. For me, it was nice having two eager extra sets of hands to hold the baby, make home repairs, cook, straighten up, answer the phone and perhaps not least important two extra voices to provide a constant stream of encouragement and support. It was also just great having their companionship during the day while Adi is studying and most of my friends are working (I don't have a lot of energy to make plans yet anyway). Also of course in the middle of the night. My mother would sit with me and talk while I nursed or my father would take a kvetchy Ahuva so I could sleep without waking Adi.